What Nobody Tells You About Your Twenties | Livi Redden | TEDxBayonne · TEDx Talks
Livi Redden在演讲中分享了她如何在20岁时摆脱迷茫，通过改变心态和情感发展，帮助年轻人更好地应对人生重大决策。适合练习情感表达和成长主题。
Transcriber: Graziele Cavalcante Reviewer: Mujtaba bakhet
转录者：Graziele Cavalcante 审稿人：Mujtaba Bakhet
The answer is yes.
答案是肯定的。
I did play basketball.
我确实打过篮球。
Yeah.
是的。
I remember the exact day and place my entire life changed and I didn't even know it.
我清楚地记得那个日子，以及那个让我整个人生都发生改变的地点——而我当时却浑然不知。
It's April 26th and I'm 18 years old.
今天是4月26日，我18岁了。
I'm in the gym.
我在健身房。
I'm listening to a podcast, as I usually do when I work out.
我正在听一个播客，就像我平时锻炼时习惯做的那样。
And I heard the podcast guest in my ear say something.
然后我听到播客嘉宾在我耳边说了些什么。
I'd heard so many of these 30 to 60 something psychologists, activists, authors and business leaders say many times before.
我之前已经听过很多次这些年龄在 30 到 60 岁之间的心理学家、社会活动家、作家和商业领袖们的言论了。
If I had the same mindset now that I did in my teens or 20s, I’d be miserable.
如果我现在还保持着青少年或二十多岁时那种思维方式，那我一定会非常痛苦的。
I was such an idiot.
我真是个十足的傻瓜。
I remember every time I heard those statements expressed with a laugh, it made me feel sad.
我记得每次听到那些被当作笑话说出来的话时，都会让我感到难过。
I was entering college.
我当时正在准备进入大学。
I didn't want to be miserable, and then I felt actually pretty irritated.
我不想让自己陷入痛苦之中，结果却感到非常烦躁（或：非常恼火）。
I refused to be miserable.
我拒绝让自己活在痛苦之中。
Much of this refusal of misery had to do with that.
这种对苦难的抗拒，在很大程度上正是与上述原因有关的。
Just five months earlier, I had sat hand in hand with my dad as he passed away after a six year battle with the terminal disease, ALS.
就在五个月前，我还和父亲紧紧握着手，看着他在与这种绝症——肌萎缩侧索硬化症（ALS）抗争了六年之后离世。
Following that experience, I promised myself I would not spend a moment of my life hating it.
经历了那次之后，我向自己承诺：我绝不会在人生的任何时刻去憎恨它。
As I learned that time is never promised.
那时我明白了：时间从来都是不可预知的（也就是说，我们永远无法确定时间会如何流逝）。
My irritation intensified as I reflected on the fact that these personal development leaders are rarely talking to young people specifically.
当我意识到这些个人发展领域的专家几乎从不专门与年轻人交流时，我的恼火情绪愈发强烈。
This didn't make any sense to me because I thought, Aren't we the ones that need to know this stuff about growth,
这对我来说完全无法理解。因为我想：“我们不正是那些需要了解有关成长这些知识的人吗？
mindfulness and emotions the most?
对正念（mindfulness）和情绪（emotions）的影响最大吗？
Over the next decade, I was supposed to determine a field of study or career, potentially find a life partner,
在接下来的十年里，我需要确定自己的研究方向或职业选择，同时或许还需要找到人生伴侣。
decide where to live, handle personal finances and retirement, maybe even start a family and many other decisions that had life long impacts.
需要决定居住地、管理个人财务和退休规划，甚至可能组建家庭；这些决策都会对一个人的一生产生深远影响。
But here I was with thousands of other high school seniors receiving the same piece of advice for most of the adults in our lives.
然而，此刻的我正和其他数千名高中毕业生一起，听着那些对我们大多数人来说都同样适用的建议。
You've got time.
你还有时间。
You'll figure it out.
你会想出办法的。
I just don't think you need to worry about it.
我只是觉得你没必要为此担心。
And although this advice is slightly anxiety reducing in the moment, we are rarely if ever, given practical,
虽然这些建议在短期内确实能缓解人们的焦虑情绪，但我们很少（甚至几乎从未）得到真正具有实用性的建议或指导。
emotional and decision making, training, making the anxiety, reducing moments extremely short and fleeting.
情绪管理、决策能力培养、相关培训的开展，以及通过各种方法将焦虑感带来的负面影响降到最低——让那些焦虑的瞬间变得极其短暂且容易消失。
Because we didn't know how to navigate these decisions we had to make.
因为我们不知道该如何做出这些决策，所以不得不依靠其他方式来帮助自己完成这些选择。
And so with that moment in the gym, I found my mission to change the rhetoric of what your teens and 20s could and should be.
就在健身房的那一刻，我明确了自己的使命：改变人们对青少年和二十多岁人群的刻板印象，让他们明白自己真正能够并且应该成为什么样的人。
Which brings me to today.
这就引出了今天的话题。
And after a bit more study, it turns out teenage Libby had some very valid points, two points in specific down to a neurological level.
经过进一步的研究，发现十几岁的莉比提出了一些非常有道理的观点；其中有两个观点甚至在神经学层面上也得到了验证。
How we train our brains now in our 20s truly matters when it comes to setting ourselves up for a less stressful and more fulfilling life.
我们在二十多岁时如何训练自己的大脑，对于能否过上压力更小、更有意义的生活来说，确实至关重要。
Your brain is a complex system of neurological pathways.
你的大脑是一个由众多神经通路构成的复杂系统。
You can think of it like a complex system of roads.
你可以把它想象成一个由众多道路组成的复杂系统。
The more you drive specific routes, the more ingrained those habits and behavioral patterns become.
你越经常行驶某些特定的路线，这些习惯和行为模式就越会深深地扎根在你的行为中。
And that is why it's so important
这就是为什么这件事如此重要的原因。