What My Politically Divided Family Teaches Me | Tami Pyfer | TED · TED
Tami Pyfer分享她如何在政治观点不同的家庭中找到沟通方式。她通过Dignity Index工具，帮助家人以尊重的态度讨论政治，从而促进理解与成长。适合练习：沟通技巧、情感表达、成长思维。
When I was working as the education policy advisor for the governor of Utah, I was approached by a group of elementary school students
在我担任犹他州州长教育政策顾问期间，有一群小学生找到了我。
who reached out asking for my help.
是那个人主动联系我，请求我的帮助的。
These young entrepreneurs were learning how to create their own businesses, and they had decided to create a portrait business.
这些年轻的创业者正在学习如何创办自己的企业，他们决定从事肖像画创作的业务。
If you sent them a photo and $6, they would sketch your portrait.
如果你给他们发一张照片并支付6美元，他们就会为你画一幅肖像画。
Well I was eager to support these students, and so I sent this photo of my oldest son.
我很愿意支持这些学生，因此我发了我长子的一张照片。
He's a musician.
他是一名音乐家。
And I've always thought that this picture really captured his personality.
我一直认为，这张照片非常准确地体现了他的个性。
So I sent in my $6 and waited.
于是我付了 6 美元的费用，然后等待结果。
This is what I got back.
这就是我收到的回复。
(Laughter and applause) How fantastic is this, right?
（笑声和掌声）这真是太棒了，对吧？
The blue beard, the whole vibe.
那蓝色的胡须，还有整个氛围……
My son loved this so much that it's hanging in his studio.
我儿子非常喜欢这个作品，以至于它现在被挂在了他的工作室里。
I loved it so much, I wanted them to draw me.
我太喜欢它了，以至于希望他们能为我画一幅画。
So I sent this photo of my husband and me.
所以我发了一张我和我丈夫的照片。
We were out to dinner for my birthday.
为了庆祝我的生日，我们出去吃了晚餐。
It's one of my favorite photos.
这是我最喜欢的照片之一。
For $6, this is what I got back.
花6美元后，我得到的就是这些。
Ouch.
哎哟……
It can be a little painful when you realize that the way you see yourself is dramatically --
当你意识到自己看待自己的方式发生了巨大变化时，可能会感到有些痛苦……
Dramatically different from how other people see you.
这与其他人对你的看法截然不同。
But that gap, that difference in perspective, can also be powerful.
然而，这种差距、这种视角上的差异，也可能带来巨大的影响力（或：这种差异同样可以产生积极的作用）。
Because when we learn to see ourselves through a new lens, it can open a path to growth.
因为当我们学会用新的视角来看待自己时，这就能为我们开辟通往成长的道路。
And it just might be the key to strengthening democracy.
而这或许正是加强民主制度的关键所在。
A few years ago, my family was struggling, not because we didn't love each other, but because like a lot of families,
几年前，我的家庭遇到了困难。这并不是因为我们彼此不爱，而是因为和许多家庭一样……
our political differences had started to impact the way we interacted with each other.
我们之间的政治分歧开始影响我们彼此之间的相处方式。
We're a politically diverse family.
我们是一个政治观点多元化的家庭。
I have five kids who belong to five political parties.
我有五个孩子，他们分别隶属于五个不同的政党。
I have an independent, a Democrat, a Democratic socialist, a libertarian and a Republican.
我身边有五个人：一位独立派人士、一位民主党人、一位民主社会主义者、一位自由意志主义者，以及一位共和党人。
And my husband and I have different political views as well.
我和我的丈夫在政治观点上也存在分歧。
He is an unaffiliated conservative, and I am a moderate Republican.
他是一名没有所属政治党派的保守派人士，而我则是一名立场温和的共和党人。
We're basically our own focus group.
我们基本上就是自己的“焦点小组”——也就是说，我们会通过自己的讨论和互动来收集信息、分析问题。
I've always considered raising kids with independent views a parenting win.
我一直认为，培养出具有独立思考能力的孩子是一种成功的育儿方式。
But during this time, it didn't feel like anyone was winning.
但在那段时间里，感觉似乎没有人真正取得了胜利。
Conversations got tense.
谈话的气氛变得紧张起来。
Sometimes we argued, but mostly we just avoided talking about anything that could stir controversy.
有时候我们会争论，但大多数时候我们都会避免谈论任何可能引发争议的话题。
our Thanksgiving dinners, we implemented the no-politics rule.
在我们的感恩节晚餐上，我们严格执行了“禁止谈论政治”的规定。
But even then, an unguarded comment could break the truce.
但即便在那时，一句不经意的评论也可能会打破这种“休战”状态。
Slowly, I recognized something else coming into our conversations and our interactions.
渐渐地，我注意到还有其他一些东西开始出现在我们的对话和互动中。
It was more than disagreement.
这不仅仅是意见不合那么简单。
It was more than conflict.
这不仅仅是冲突那么简单。